|Too often people forget
about all the colors of the year, leaving only the blues during
the holiday season.
Because it is such a big time for so many different people
(with Christmas, Hanukah, Kwanzaa and New Years just to name
a few) the effect is so amplified. It’s a very good
time for many people, with family gatherings and vacations…
but for so many others, it represents a time of emptiness
or even deep sadness.
|The reasons are as many
as the lights in the trees or over-hyped toys on the shelves,
but the results are the same… a lousy mood. It doesn’t
have to be that way…
“I miss him/her”
This might be the first big holiday without someone special.
It may be through a death, divorce or even just being separated
by miles; in either case, that person isn’t here. That
can be a real downer, especially if you know they’re
not coming back, but take comfort in the power of the past.
It holds within it wonderful memories, and the fact that someone
special was a part of it. To have never had that would be
And don’t forget about the other 6 billion people out
there. True they will never replace the one you miss, but
don’t let your sadness miss out on your chance to know
someone who is literally one-in-six-billion.
“I can’t afford to give”
Sometimes we get so caught up in the idea of giving that we
limit ourselves to gifts… and when we can’t afford
them, we feel more worthless than yesterday’s wrapping.
There is so much more you can give than some possession that
gathers dust. Writing a note telling someone how much they
mean to you will last an eternity. Sometimes just “showing
up” shows it all.
“I can’t be there”
Oh, now you’re putting all your value into physical
space, are you? Don’t you realize that we are all connected
wherever we are? Even if it seems nicer to be there in the
same area, it’s not an all or nothing deal. Being there
is “spirit” means just that. Don’t devalue
one way of being there because you don’t have the other.
“It’s so over commercialized”
Companies need to make a profit, that’s their motivating
factor for trying to sell to you ever chance they get. Their
desperation can take them to the extremes. All you have to
do is go into any store at Halloween time to see the Christmas
ornaments to know exactly what that means. Yet that’s
their thing, not yours. You’re the one who’s letting
ugly plastic trinkets cheapen your mood. If you are determined
to have real, heart-touching holidays you can. Saying “it’s
too commercialized” is just an excuse for something
deeper, so don’t use it.
“Is this all there is?”
This is probably one of the real root causes for your depression.
The ending of a year marks a milestone that puts people in
a reflective mood. If you look back at the past year and you
didn’t accomplish what you thought you would, it just
puts in you a rotten mood. It can make you angry and disappointed,
which when directed at yourself turns into depression.
If you just leave it at that, you will have weeks of misery
and no real solution. Stop that! Turn your attention towards
the positive before it’s too late.
Write down all the accomplishments of the past year.
Go back to a date book or calendar if you’ve been keeping
track. You might be surprised at how much you really did accomplish.
Reaffirm your goals
Since this is a reflective time, why not check in with your
goals and see which is still wroth pursuing?
Set new goals
Planning ahead gets your head out of the past and looking
toward the future.
Become determined to enjoy the holidays
You CAN enjoy the holidays, no matter how much your misery
likes company. Even if you find little moments, you can do
something you enjoy. Think creatively; free yourself from
the blues. Look for the other colors out there; they’re
out there. You just have to look around.