Paranoia is the “unreasonable fear that someone is out to get you.” It’s not paranoia when people really ARE out to get you. Whether it’s a coworker stealing your ideas or a spouse that’s undermining your diet with dessert, there are going to be those times when someone else will try to stop you from succeeding.
You don’t even have to give in for them to win. The moment you even re-act to them, they gain control. It’s going to take a lot of resolve if you want to reach your goals.
It’s also going to need a strategy.
Pro-act, not re-act
For every action, there is a reaction; so says the physic professors. The moment you react to another’s actions, all that person has to do is carefully orchestrate their actions to move you where they want you to go. If every move you make is based on your own decision to move forward, then they either have to react (giving you control) or ignore you (giving you freedom).
Ignoring them won’t make them go away. It might give them the upper hand to go behind your back. It will only work in limited situations on limited occasions. Yet, sometimes simply ignoring their attempts will be enough to prevent them from hurting you.
Sometimes the direct approach is the most powerful one. “I know you’re doing this, stop.” That alone could disarm them. Either they weren’t aware they were sabotaging you or they can’t handle being exposed. If that stops them, then that’s all that’s important.
The bigger and stronger you are, the tougher it will be for someone to win over you. Keep fortifying yourself, whatever that means. It could be more education to become smarter or exercising to become fitter… anything to make you better. That way, others will only tire themselves out when they try to stop you.
Keep in mind here, that it’s about become indestructible, not about reacting to their attacks (see rule #1).
Go on the Offense
Sometimes the best defense is the offense. Although this runs the risk of taking you off your path of success; the situation might be such that you have no choice but to do things that will stop them from hurting you.
This is tricky, because you must not go out for revenge. Deliberately going out of your way to hurt someone else makes you as bad as they are; and will only give them “reason” to come back at you. The offense is to find ways to stop them from hurting you, not hurt them; and that’s not an easy solution.
The best revenge is success.
Think of a horse race. True, you have to be aware of the other horses around you, but if all you do is move based on another horse, you’ll never reach the goal. Stay focused on the prize and run your own race, regardless of who else is in it with you. Ultimately it’s you and the destination.
Stay the Course
This is the part where you just keep doing what you’re doing. It involves everything, from being proactive to ignoring others, keeping your focus and being strong enough to not be brought down. This is the key to success; because you never fail until you stop trying.
There’s more than one way to win
Those people that are trying to get you to react are basically saying that it’s their way or no way. That’s their misunderstanding. Remember, this isn’t baseball you’re playing, with only one “home” to get to. It’s more like basketball with two hoops – theirs AND yours.
“Truth will out”
Be true to yourself and your intentions. Those that matter will understand; those that don’t, never will.